Tuesday, December 30, 2025

Unease and Discontent

We are having a nice getaway, staying in rural PA with some friends, exploring and enjoying the outdoors and nearby historic sites. We went to a Civil War museum, and then to the State Capitol in Harrisburg - both really interesting. 
For all intents and purposes, everything is great. 

 And yet. 

And yet, there is a nagging sense of discontent that's just kind of there. Like a film on top of boiled milk. Like an unpleasant aftertaste that just lingers. 

I feel like I can't trust myself. Like I am on a cliff edge but have no idea that I am a step away from a catastrophe. 

Maybe this is just PMS. Maybe this is the dread because of where we are as a society. Maybe this is the result of scanning the news headlines, always anticipating more bad news - and even if nothing terrible happened today, it's a short-lived relief because, surely, something terrible is going to happen tomorrow. 

Somewhat related... I started crocheting. There might be a reason why we associate crocheting and knitting with old ladies. Perhaps this is how old ladies keep their sanity. It is shocking how calming it is. Gasp... Knitting Through Menopause - isn't that a great title for a book? 

Tell me about an activity that helps you feel calm and in control.

2 comments:

  1. Hi it’s Dasha from momofchildren.com
    I remember back in 2023, spring, I was feeling flat as a pancake. Also had a feeling of mental malaise that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. I have have entered pero-menopause then. Now we are almost in 2026, and am still in peri-menopause and get awful pms/pmdd where I am miserable, just miserable and I can’t do anything about it except wait it out and let myself be miserable. In November my luteal phase was terrible, but in December, for whatever reason, I felt okay, just sad. But not ragey.
    It’s fun to be a woman.

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    Replies
    1. Dasha - thank you for sharing this. Means a lot to hear I'm not alone in this.

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