Speech Therapy

When I was a kid, my mother was concerned about my “speech problem”. I stuttered, occasionally, and I tended to speak so fast other people had a hard time understanding me.  I remember my mom dragging me to see speech therapists back in Russia, who either said I would grow out of it or would put me into a horrible speech therapy group and made me do idiotic (from the perspective of a kid) exercises. Honestly, I thought she was greatly exaggerating. I didn’t think I had any problems at all. My friends seemed to understand me just fine. I did well in school.

When I was a teenager, the stuttering got worse, especially after coming to the US (I was 16). Someone recommended that I go see a speech therapist – again. 

I did go, and to my surprise, it wasn’t too bad. That speech therapist lady was amazing – she saw me as a whole person, not just “the speech problem” to be fixed. It was a joy to work with her. She was the first person – ever – who managed to explain to me what it meant that I talked too fast.

Everyone was always saying – you are talking too fast, slow down, speak slowly, can you say that again – slowly? It annoyed the hell out of me. I did not feel that I was speaking too fast at all, so it seemed like it was someone else’s problem. 

The speech therapist (unfortunately, I don’t remember her name) asked me to sing. After I sang a short song, she asked me to sing it again – but now, in the tempo I would use in a conversation. And that was the big moment –I felt the difference. Forever before, when people said “you talk too fast”, it was just so disconnected. Even when I heard myself recorded (like on an answering machine), there was a disconnect – I could tell the person was talking too fast, but I felt like that person didn’t have anything to do with me.* The speech therapist really helped me find a point of reference, she helped me understand what it felt like when words coming out of my mouth too fast.

When I turned 18, I had to transfer to an adult speech therapist. And that was… not good. The new speech therapist kept mouthing words as I was talking (as if she was trying to help me talk, I guess?). It was driving me bonkers. I believe she was more used to working with people who had speech issues after stroke – so it just wasn’t a good fit. I quit after a couple of sessions with her.

I am not sure how much of a genetic component there is to stuttering. I know that I have a few relatives on my grandfather’s side who stutter. One of my kids tends to talk too fast when super-excited about something. I’ll have to do the singing game – maybe that’ll help. 

Did you ever have to be in speech therapy? Did it help?

*True story. My parents were planning to come and visit me soon after I started college. I left a message on their answering machine, telling them exactly where and what time to meet me. I was furious when they didn’t show up. It turned out, they couldn’t understand my message. They even played the recording back for me. I couldn’t understand what I was saying, either.