Naming Names

After they got married and moved into their apartment, my parents named their new furniture. They had a kitchen set (table, stools, kitchen cabinets – that sort of thing) that was pretty fancy – I believe it was either from Germany or Czechoslovakia, I am not sure at this point. They called it “Kasya”.

They named the “big room” furniture “Teddy.” Teddy was a stenka (wall) – a set of 3 upright cabinets and shelves with glass doors and a bar in the middle. I guess the modern term would be modular shelves? We used it for storing fine china and crystal (behind glass doors), books (most of the other shelves), a record player, drinks (inside the bar), as well as knick-knacks, souveniers, and vases with candy.

Kasya didn’t really stick. But Teddy (we said Fedya in Russian) – that one got used a lot! I spent my childhood convinced that Teddy was just another word for shelves. My parents would say “I left my watch on Teddy – can you grab it?” “Please put your books back on Teddy!” I would ask “Mom, can I get a candy out of Teddy?”

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A few years ago, our coffee machine broke. It was not even 3 years old and we were super annoyed – because when we buy things, we expect them to last forever. Or, at least 25 years. It was one of those hyper-modern things with buttons and sealed bottom that you couldn’t open up and attempt to fix. It was not expensive or fancy in any way, and it would have been cheaper to buy a new one than to pay for repairs. Still, we were very, very annoyed.

So, my husband unearthed this beastly thing from the 80’s (or maybe 70’s) that his dad used to have in his work office back in the day. A coffee machine, with an analogue clock that could be used to set the timer and get the coffee going first thing in the morning. [My husband never throws anything out unless it is totally broken up and not usable. And even then, chances are, I’ll find it in the garage sitting on a shelf and taking up space. His family is the same. My family is the same, too. That’s why we have a last-century coffee machine.]

He proudly put the new/old coffee machine on the kitchen counter and plugged it in (he did wash it very thoroughly… after all, it’s been sitting and gathering dust for a few decades). Guess what? It worked!!! The analogue timer worked, too. It also made this loud whale-song noise every time it was brewing us some coffee. This happened around the same time my kids were listening to a children’s CD with a collection of silly and cute songs. One of the songs (our son’s favorite, he would play it over, and over, and over) was about Wendy the Whale. So, naturally, we started calling the coffee machine Wendy the Whale (on the account of the noises it was making), which then got truncated to simply Wendy.

Is Wendy done making coffee? Did you start Wendy yet? Wait, I need to get Wendy going…

Do you ever name your furniture or appliances?