Weekend Report and Musings on Stress

We had a whirlwind of a weekend. There is a big part of me that is really craving a calm, relaxing weekend, where I can go for long walks and smell the honeysuckle, daydream, and read. There is also a smaller part of me that is constantly poking and nagging to get stuff done, and to do xyz with the kids, to plan family outings, to see people. This weekend was sort of fail/fail on both fronts. There was one thing after another of activities and chores. Everything felt so rushed and I couldn't just be in the moment - because there was the next thing coming and I needed to think about how we were going to get to that next thing. In spite of feeling so very busy (and there were 3 times the normal amount of events and activities this weekend), and, objectively, getting a lot done (planting the garden!), it feels like we didn't accomplish much. Funny how the reality and our feelings of what happened have so little in common.

I need to sit back and just stop... stop the rushing, stop worrying, and just allow things to happen and allow myself to enjoy the process... And yet, I feel so bad and so anxious about wasting time right now. There is this short time period when I can enjoy the outdoors before it gets too hot, and then it'll be hot and humid and unpleasant, and I am going to regret wasting the whole of June on... who knows what (escapist books? daydreaming? dawdling?)

What got done:

• Older daughter's Piano Guild
• Older daughter's Dance Recital
• Piles of laundry (washed, folded and put away)
• Cooking for the week
• Eating outside every single day, no mater the weather
• 1 game of Clue
• Friend's kid's birthday party
• Board meeting at the synagouge
• Planting vegetables in the garden
• Planting 2 berry bushes
• Shopping for food and plants
• Reading 
• 2 episodes of Sneaky Pete
• Went for a morning walk with my son

What didn't get done:

• Cleaning out the attic
• Switching clothing around for me and the kids
• Work
• Reading The Chosen with the kids
• Getting up before 7 am to exercise
• Planting honeysuckle and butterfly bush